Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Say It With Slacks.

It's officially Spring! Happy Spring, everyone!

Okay, fine, maybe not "weather-wise," but in terms of whimsical, breezy fashion? SPRING. 

For example:


Let's begin.

  • They are not only "slacks," but they are LADIES' SLACKS. 
  • These slacks require zero ironing. Which is good, because I couldn't tell you the timesuck that ironing my slacks has become.
  • No matter what circumstances are going down in your life, the elastic waistband of these beauties will not roll. Weeding azaleas, running from the fuzz, your waistband= solidly in place. Somewhere up there by your ribcage.
  • Two handy pockets! For your handies! (Compared to other slacks' pockets which aren't so useful?)
  • "Rich" "Miracle" "Polyester" are all words that they've used in the same sentence as "Fabric." 
  • A lifetime indelible crease. Frankly, that kind of staying power frightens me. 
  • The woman on the left has never before been out-of-doors. You can tell by the way she's holding her wrists and that one foot.
  • The woman on the right is a mobster's wife. I'm sorry, fanning out cash?
  • They are seven dollars a pair when you buy four pairs. Wait- just wait- they also do the math for you if you want to buy FIVE OR EVEN SIX PAIRS. So not only do they fully expect their clientele to wear these slacks every day of the week, they're also assuming you don't know what seven times however many pairs of slacks you need would be. There's no discount or anything. They're just letting you know they think you're rather slow. 


But exquisitely slack-ed. 

10 comments:

Shawna said...

So...$7 dollars a pair if you buy 4 or more? But also only $7 dollars a pair if you buy only one, am I correct? Those tricky advertisements.

Kelly@MentalGarbage said...

They also do not come in anything smaller than an 8. Now what the EFF am I supposed to do for slacks?! I was ready to order up!!!

Unknown said...

I haven't laughed this hard in a week! (Probably more, I was being generous with myself.) Thanks, I totally needed this.

Alison said...

That lady with her wrists, just slayed me.
Where on earth do you find such gems??

Unknown said...

I'm pretty sure my mom is still wearing these. Proudly.

Keely said...

They sure know how to make a deal, yeah?

Keely said...

It's a very specific clientele.

Keely said...

Aw, thank YOU! Or more accurately, thank the slacks.

Keely said...

They find me, Alison, they find me.

Keely said...

Pretty sure the only way to wear these babies is proudly.