This is my writing for the day. My apologies.

Not to toot my own horn or anything...(yes, I'm making a trumpet with my fist and and a bizarre sound through pursed lips)...and I know that a ton of you have seen this already...but my bio and interview are up on two separate parts of the Local 75 webpage! In case you were wondering how my writing stacks up to different types of wine- wonder no more! (Just a warning, though; the difference between an intellectual and myself is kinda like the difference between the Mississippi River and a Slip n' Slide.)

Need some more proof? I was listening to a little Springsteen this morning (after I got soaked by the meeting of a vengeful track and a wayward, pond-like puddle) and specifically the track 'Rosalita.' Great song, obviously, but what I had never really paid attention to was the verse where he lists all of his friends that are going to meet up later. Jack the Rabbit, Weak-knees Willie, Sloppy Sue and Big Bones Billie (!) are all heading out to, you know, play some pool and act real cool.

This is awesome.

Furthermore, Springsteen's E Street Band has members named (among many, many others) Mad Dog, Boom and Miami Steve. So- my question is, can we do this? I know I'm a little past the age where we can tell our friends to call us Ace or K-Rock (for example), but I'm really feeling this one. Besides, there's a rumor that Miami Steve (who was later on The Sopranos) got his nickname because he went to Miami ONCE!

COME ON!

Okay, pals, get going. I need an amazing nickname. But, more importantly (waay more importantly), all of you need amazing nicknames. This will allow me to have that crucial moment of awesome at a party where I turn to people and say, "This is lame. Hey, Pipes! Trigger, Philly Joe! Wanna cut out and meet up with Fish Sticks and Hot Pants?"

Please, let's all work together to make this happen.

This is my wishness.