Monday, September 9, 2013

Back To School. Now With More Feelings!

I know a lot of you have been playing the Back To School game now for weeks...

But now it's my turn. With this kid.

...And her Back To School helper.

It's her second year of preschool (which is what happens when you start with a Young 3s program)...but I'm just as emotional as if she were going off to college. For very short, very young people. Okay, I'm not devastated sad. Of course not. Just twinge-y. Saddish. Hormonal.

And it's not like I think preschool is a hop, skip, and jump away from other-side-of-the-world independence (though some would argue that it is). No, I'm a bundle of Feelings for two reasons:

1. I miss her. Plain n' simple. I've gotten so used to this free-spirited little lady just wandering from room to room, reading her books, asking the occasional question, and always being game for a project or adventure. And while three mornings a week isn't the equivalent of a Peace Corp tour, it leaves a big (okay, smallish) Nora-sized hole in my day.

2. Each time she starts a new class or chapter in her life, it becomes glaringly obvious to me that one day- perhaps even soon- she'll be onward and upward and forward and not slowing down, not even the tiniest bit, and she'll never again just be my little kid at home. And it seems like she's already started that trajectory.

And I miss her.

Yesterday, P.J. showed me this commercial. Warning: If you're an easy crier, you'll cry. Easily.



So no matter how special I make each day and no matter how often (or infrequently) I document each little Pinterest-worthy milestone, she's well on her way to the rest of her life.

That's what I think about on each first day of school. And while I always want Nora (and Susannah and Roo) to be wildly happy and live with absolute freedom (from worry, from Mom-guilt)...

I already miss her.

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